Dreams and Spaghettios
In October 2006 the best and the worst thing happened to me. On a beautiful, crisp autumn day I was called into the board room at the company I worked for and heard those two words Donald Trump has made famous: “You’re fired”.
It came somewhat out of the blue. There were signs I should have seen but I was pretty naive at the time. After listening to my boss degrade me for 30 minutes and trying to convince him I wasn’t everything he was saying I was, I was officially told to leave the building and not come back. Looking back I wish I would have just said “take this job and shove it” and left with my head held high. I did not have the confidence or self-esteem to ever say that to anyone back then.
I grabbed my purse, jacket and a few personal items and rushed out the door while trying not to hyperventilate. Little did I know my step out that office door was the first step on the path to becoming the CEO of Me®.
I was 25 and living on my own with very little money in the bank and lots of bills on their way. To put it simply, I was terrified. Most of all, I felt like a failure. I had worked at this job for 5 years. I was salaried so I ended up working a lot more than 40 hours a week and not getting extra pay for it. I had given so much time, energy and effort to this job and I put up with some difficult people and situations. I wasn’t perfect, I know I made mistakes. I was young and maybe not mature enough yet for the high-end clients we dealt with, but I always tried to do my best.
It was just plain devastating for me to be fired. My boss made me feel like the worst person who ever walked the earth. He made me feel like I would never be able to get another good job or show my face in this town again. I have always dealt with feelings of inadequacy, not being good enough and feeling like I didn’t fit in. Being fired seemed to confirm those fears.
That day, I felt completely broken, confused, terrified and beaten down. I walked around in a daze for the first few days. I kept trying to rationalize things and figure out how to get my job back. I didn’t really want my job back, I just didn’t want people out there saying or thinking bad things about me. (Talk about majorly low self-steem and people pleasing problems.)
Through the fear and the pain though, somewhere inside of me, there was this whisper, this hope, this determination. It was this little whisper reminding me of the dreams I had from when I was a little girl. This little whisper telling me maybe this was my chance to do something more with my life, to be someone more.
Erma Bombeck said: “There are people who put their dreams in a little box and say, “Yes, I’ve got dreams, of course I’ve got dreams.” Then they put the box away and bring it out once in a while to look in it, and yep, they’re still there.”
That was me, I had put my dreams in a box on the shelf. I didn’t think I could achieve them. Worst of all, I had let myself come to believe the lie that I didn’t deserve to live the life of my dreams.
I decided that this would not be the end of my story. I decided that I was not, could not, and would not go back to a corporate job again. I was going to make it on my own. I was going to go for my dreams. I was going to be more than a nobody at a desk in an office whose boss yelled at them all day long. I was going to use my talents and my unique personality to make a difference.
I didn’t know how it was all going to happen or where this path was going to take me. I just knew I was willing to do whatever it took to not have to go back to the corporate world. I knew in my heart that God had a plan.
Martina McBride’s song “This One’s for the Girls” felt like my anthem. I literally was “the girl that was twenty-five, In a little apartment, just trying to get by. Living on, on dreams and spaghettio’s, Wondering where her life was gonna go.”
Losing my job led me to working my direct sales business as a business and earning a full time income working from home within just a few months. Not only that but I gained confidence, self-worth and made so many amazing friends. It gave me the CEO of Me lifestyle that I had always dreamed about but never would have had the courage to pursue had I not been fired. It showed me how strong I was, where my real skills and passions were and helped me be able to inspire and empower others to go for their dreams too. You can read more about my journey here and how I help others go from struggling to successful as a Coach now.
I had no idea that one of the worst things that ever happened to me would turn out to be one of the best things that had ever happened to me. These past 12 years have taken me down some amazing paths, some good, some bad and some great. I wouldn’t trade a mile of it or who I am today because of it all though. So many of my wildest dreams have come true! Now I dream bigger than ever because I know that I can achieve whatever I put my heart into and work hard for.
If you are one of those girls or women who is living on dreams & spaghettio’s just trying to survive, I hope my story inspires you. I hope you can listen to that little whisper from your heart telling you that you are meant for more, that you deserve happiness and that you can achieve your dreams, because you can. Keep believing, keep working & one day you can tell your own amazing story of going from struggle to success too.
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